Wednesday, August 20, 2008

The Bike Snob is always good for a chuckle. His Worst of Craigslist entries are among his fun ongoing segments. The STL doesn't have the same bike scene NYC but, just for the heck of it, I wanted to see how many of us are having their hearts broken while riding our bikes. With all due respect to The Snob, I present STL's Worst of Craigslist.

Hot Guy Jogging - m4m - 26 (Forest Park)


Reply to: pers-74432xxxx@craigslist.o
rg
Date: 2008-07-06, 10:16AM CDT


Hey man. I doubt you'll see this. I doubt even more that you are gay. But I wanted to tell you that you are the hottest guy I've ever seen in the flesh in my
life. I'm not kidding.

Sunday. 9-10AM. I was riding my bike around the bike trail, you were jogging the same trail in the opposite direction. We passed each other twice. You were shirtless and in dark shorts. Dark hair, gorgeous pecs and perfect skin tone.

Wow.
Anyway, good for you, man.

This jogger must really be a hunka hunka burnin' love.

------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Tuesday morning in Forest Park - m4m - 26 (Fores
t Park)

Reply to: pers-77439xxxx@craigslist.org

Date: 2008-07-29, 7:56AM CDT


You were the guy jogging in Forest Park. Black shorts and shirtless (your white shirt was at your side).


I was the guy going the opposite direction on a blue bike. Navy shorts and white t-shirt.


Around 6:30-7 Tuesday morning we passed each other along the North side
of the Park, near the Northeast corner between some ponds. We gave each other long looks as we passed. A long shot, I know, but fortune favors the bold.

Hmmm? A hot, shirtless jogger wearing dark shorts that is turning on a gay, 26 yr old guy in Forest Park. Sounds familiar. What is going on up there?

Fortune follows the bold. Does fortune follow those who, not so boldly, post on Craigslist?

-----------------------------------------------------
Forest Park jogger - m4m - 26 (Forest Park)

Reply
to: pers-79075xxxx@craigslist.org
Date: 2008-08-10, 10:05AM CDT


You were the asian shirtless guy jogging along the Forest Park bike trail between 9 and 10 AM Sunday.
I was the white guy wearing a white t-shirt riding my bike on the same bike trail going the opposite direction. We passed each other near the Science Center's outdoor dinosaurs. Our eyes met and then we quickly passed each other by. I wanted to tell you that I think you are very attractive. Would love to hear you, but I know that is a long shot. Maybe I'll see you in the Park again soon.

Not another shirtless guy in Forest park driving a 26 yr old gay guy crazy. I bet he was wearing dark shorts.

The Science Center dinosaurs are one of the most romantic places in the city so I am not surprised by this chance encounter.

A re-enactment:

------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Clamshell top girl riding bike at Forest Park - m4w - 27 (Forest Park)

Reply to: pers-75266xxxx@craigslist.org

Date: 2008-07-12, 7:22PM CDT


If you are the woman riding her bike at Forest Park about two weeks ago email me back if your single. You were wearing a top that resembled a clamshell but it was not really a clamshell. I take it that you are single because of the flashy top, wish all girls rode the way you do. I think I remember you had blond hair, but then again I was a little distracted so I could be w
rong. Send a pic so I know it is you.

Speaking from a guy's perspective, there is no better way to get a guy's attention than to wear something that is not a clamshell, but looks like a clamshell. We wish all girls rode in flashy tops that resembled a clamshell.

Do women really like when a guy proudly proclaims that he does not remember a feature like the victim's... err... I mean lady's hair color because he was too busy staring at her chest?

A re-enactment:
---------------------------------
kent dr - m4w (wentzville)

Reply to: pers-801527686@craigslist.org

Date: 2008-08-18, 5:14AM CDT


it was very nice seeing you,standing in your front yard yesterday.Even though i almost crashed my bike,in the sand.Just want you to know,you drive me crazy.

This girl drives you so crazy that you forget to put spaces after commas and periods.

Clamshell tops will do that to a guy.

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
you asked about my bike on the metrolink - m4w - 28 (forest park)

Reply to: pers-78067xxxx@craigslist.org
Date: 2008-08-02, 6:30PM CDT

i was actually checking you out when you got on the train. you had a super cute retro look right down to the old school ten-speed you had with you. when i got off the traain you asked about the gps on my handles bars. funny thing is that i was going to ask if you wouldnt mind do some quick poses for me (i was headed out to the park to take pictures) if you where getting off there.

if you might be interested email me. tell me how tall i was, lol.

This is a beautiful story that brings tears to my eyes. Let's summarize.

Mr. Fake Photographer Guy was on the train checking out Ms Retro-Girl who accessorizes her outfits with a ten-speed. He was so smitten with Ms Retro-Girl's style that he was going to ask her to 'pose for pictures'.

Women are clever, however. Ms Retro-Girl, sensing fake photographer pheromones floating through the Metrolink, asks a simple question about Mr. Fake Photographer Guy's GPS. The guy is so flustered that a woman would speak to him, that he forgot to ask her to 'pose for pictures'.

Sounds like the start of a plot to a Nora Ephron/Meg Ryan movie from the 90's.


Does he really think that a woman of such obvious refinement and retro-style would honestly be interested in a guy that was uses electronic bike bling like a GPS? I think not.

---------------------------------------------------------------
Brunette on roller blades today - m4w (Creve Coeur)

Reply to: pers-78086xxxx@craigslist.org
Date: 2008-08-02, 10:04PM CDT

I just wanted to tell you that you have a beautiful smile! I was on my bike and we passed by each other a few times. You smiled each time. Wow!

She smiled at you? Dude, whe wants you!!!

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blonde girl near WashU, my dog ripped your pants - w4w (rosedale and washington)

Reply to: pers-78600xxxx@craigslist.org
Date: 2008-08-06, 5:26PM CDT

You were riding a bike around 5:00pm on Wednesday August 6th...down Rosedale. My collie dog chased you down and ripped a hole in your leggings. I am happy to reimburse you but I forgot which house you said you lived in. After walking up and down Washington, I gave up. I have your check ready....please just let me know where to drop it.

thanks, and sorry again....he has a really big thing for bikes.

Personally, I think the submitter has a 'Big Thing' for this girl.

She was wearing leggings? Is this 1982? Will Mr Big Thing still be willing to reimburse the Olivia Newton-John wannabe when he finds out that Lassie actually ripped up a pair of $200 Assos bibshorts, instead of some leggings.

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