Dear Mr Crotchety Old Man in a Scion,

Allow me to properly answer the question that you yelled while passing me on Schuessler Rd. No, sir, I do not live on that road. Do you want to know something else? Schuessler is a public road. In fact, I think I will ride on "your" road even more in the hopes of annoying you. Drag your fat ass out of your house the next time you see me and let's have a little talk. Or better yet, yell at me from your car again. Let's see if I stay as calm as I was this evening.

Let me address the other issue you raised as you pulled into your driveway. I did not harass you after you passed me. I followed you. It is not my fault that your rubber-band powered Scion Box does not have the power to stay ahead of a bike after passing it. If I wanted to harass you I would have rode up alongside you, as I easily could have done, and began yelling, pounding on your door and mocking your shoebox vehicle. Instead, I dutifully followed your putt-putt-mobile until you began to pull off the road.

Have a nice day, ass-hole.

Sincerely
Your new lycra-clad nightmare.